WEDNESDAY LAUGHS

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Proud Jamaican Father



A Jamaican man bought a round of drinks for everyone in the bar,

announcing that his wife had just given birth to "a typical

Jamaican baby boy weighing 20 pounds."



Congratulations showered him from all around, and many

exclamations of "Wow!" were heard. A woman fainted due to sympathy

pains.



Two weeks later, he returned to the bar. The bartender said, "Say,

you're the father of the Jamaican baby who weighed 20 pounds at

birth. How much does he weigh now?"



The proud father answered, "Fifteen pounds."



The bartender was puzzled. "Why? What happened? He weighed 20

pounds at birth?"



The Jamaican father took a slow sip from his Red Stripe beer,

wiped his lips on his shirtsleeve, leaned into the bartender and

said, "Had him circumcised."



Tired Gynecologist



A gynecologist was getting tired of his job and decided to switch

careers.



He'd always enjoyed tinkering with engines, so he enrolled in a

school for car mechanics. When the class ended, the students were

given their final exam: strip a car engine completely and

reassemble it in perfect working order.



The gynecologist did his best - and was amazed to find he scored

150%. "How could that be?" he asked.



"Well," said the instructor, "I gave you 50% for taking the engine

apart. Next, I gave you 50% for reassembling it - a really

fantastic job. And then I gave you a 50% bonus for doing it all

through the exhaust pipe."



Asylum Test



Once there was an madman who was committed to an asylum.



The asylum had a rule that if any 'resident' could pass a special

5-question test, he could go free. No resident had passed in the

20-year history of the asylum.



It was the madman's turn to take the test.



After a grueling 4 hours of testing, the examining officer said,

"Well, you've passed four of the five tests. I'm very impressed.

However, the last test is the hardest of all."



The examiner lead the man to a dark room, switched on a

flashlight, and pointed it at a light bulb hanging from the

ceiling. "For your fifth test, you must walk on the beam of light

and change the bulb."



The madman looked at him with an outraged expression and

exclaimed, "Are you NUTS?!?"



He continued, "Yeah right, when I reach half-way you'll turn it

off and let me fall!"


More: http://www.hsengine.com/s_Car+Mechanic.html